Saturday, October 2, 2010

I came.. I saw.. But I am still "learning"


It has been almost two months since I moved into this small, laidback town called Bloomington in the "supposedly" dreamland of most people - United States. And the urge to write about the experience thus far hopefully translates into a good post.

So 6th August,2010 is earmarked in my memories as the day I came to Bloomington.. my journey began.. away from my homeland, my family, my relatives, my friends, my surroundings and most importantly .. my "comfort zone". I still remember my steps into the atrium of Kelley School of Business... i was overwhelmed.. - finally my dream of studying in a B-school is shaping up! That first week was crazy.. walking down the B-town for miles and hours to reach destinations because of low frequency of buses, getting lost on the way, the scorching sun, the irritation/feeling of NO respite from the Mumbai heat, tanning in that burning sun, et al. But all this was interspersed with some great fun too -
1) The swimming session with Shammo, Poonu and Priya
2) First time I went to Nicks!
3) First time at Downtown n my favourite eating outlet - Chipotle!
4) Harry bear at Bear's Place and the chicken wings :)
5) Those "regular" late night walks...
6) Jogging with Poonu
7) The "haunted" Griffy Lake clean up event - walking in the woods, collecting seeds and then laying them along the banks of the lake, plucking out unwanted rose shrubs, those horrible bruises/cuts on my legs followed by the inability to wear skirts!
8) The Cookout event - enjoying on the swings like a small kid :)
9) The night we watched "Gunda" movie.. yes, i actually watched that DUMB stuff.. and thoroughly enjoyed it :D
10) Cooking prawns for Poonu and the sense of achievement after she loving and craving for it!
11) The "stuffed portabella mushrooms" and "chicken tandoori" potluck.
12) Poonu's butter chicken cooking days... :)
13) Jamming and singing sessions
14) Ganpati celebration n potluck
15) Walking down the street and spotting cute squirrels and rabbits run helter-skelter as you approach them
16) My tryst with cycling; Poonu's and Priya's efforts to teach me; the euphoria on finally being able to cycle and screaming like a kid in the basketball court of CP (Crescent Park) ... hahaha..
17) The hula-hooping in the middle of a mall and the insanity of actually buying a hoop !!!

... Outstanding moments.. carved a niche in my mind!

But as I write this today.. I regret to say that those fun moments have reduced drastically. Some due to work constraints.. and some due to changes in people/circumstances... I was always aware that "people" behave differently when in US.. but still find it uncanny and unnerving when I experience this each day in this so-called "dreamland". I'll put a few lines in marathi to convey my thoughts aptly - Naati kashi bantat, kashi baddaltat, kashi tuttat.. he sagla baghayla milala hya 2 mahinyat.. kadhi kadhi agadi radu yete aani kadhi achanak hasu suddha yeta hya sagla natyanvar... "bandhan" hya shabdala kahi arthach nahiye hya deshat.. I think the most tiring part of all this is managing the moods and whims and fancies of people around (having said that, I am sure others might be feeling the same about me!).. But all these situations, experiences have made me realize how much I took my family and friends for granted.

On a concluding note , I would like to say that - This is life.. have to live with it!
As always, found this apt poem that echoes my thoughts at this moment:

Missing Piece © Danyal Conner

You do what you're suppose to do,
with no frown or fuss.
Not because you want to ,
but because you must.
Day after day
It's like a routine.
Don’t have too much to say,
You only do the right thing.
Soon you feel empty,
but you don't know what it could be.
You want no sympathy.
But it's something you can't see
Everything used to make sense,
but now you're lost in a maze.
You feel so tense,
and you pray for better days.
Something just doesn't seem right
You look for an answer that's not there.
You stay awake all night,
But you feel like no one cares.
It's right in your face
and you think it's safe,
or should you forget?
Things don't seem the same,
But what should you do?
You think you should change,
But change for who?
Understanding means nothing to you now.
Your heart is pronounced deceased
This should you allow ,
or find your missing piece?


... yeah.. I am learning to find the "missing piece"!

6 comments:

Poonam said...

hehe u shud put up ur cycling video... :P
k k jst kidding... cheers to many such beautiful times we will have in future.. :) :)

Tanvi said...

Poonya: doncha dare share that video with anyone !! and yeahh.. Cheers (on the rocks :P ) for many more such beautiful memories together ;)

Shamika Chindhade said...

I really like the first 17 bullets :)
brought back the fond memories...
I feel it always better to start afresh and turn over a new leaf and to rejuvenate the old memories :)

Pri... said...

Well well written post Tanu...Somehow I can instantly connect with what you wrote (in spite of the fact that I have to yet to experience anything remotely similar!! BTW!! Never knew you couldn't cycle! Wow after all these years I though I knew everything there was to know :) Just goes to show how life is a learning experience about yourself and others around you...

Unknown said...

Aww..Tanu..you put it so beautifully!
Echoes my deepest emotions! Change and growth are probably inseparable..so lets accept it happily :)

Tanvi said...

@Pri: hehhe..i hope that's the only thing you didnt know about me :P

@Priya: Yeah.. the sooner we accept people around us for what they are, the better for us!

@Shamika: Certainly.. those were fond memories! Turning over a new leaf each day makes sense but people tend to find it difficult to forget even if they forgive.. and according to me, there's is no use of forgiving someone if you can't forget what happened.. right?